Are you happier now than you used to be?
Such a hard question to answer, right? Our memories aren’t always the most reliable source of data.
Whether we see the past through rose tinted spectacles or – in contrast – fall prey to our brain’s natural negativity bias, we probably aren’t seeing things exactly as they were.
I definitely romanticise my 30s as a time when I was fancy-free and having lots of adventures – partying, travelling, festivals... But if I’m honest with myself, I also felt quite lost a lot of the time. I didn’t meet my partner until I was 37, and I hadn’t found a clear career direction for most of my early 30s.
According to research by Economist David Blanchflower, a professor at Dartmouth College (which I came across via an episode of mathematician Hannah Fry’s brilliant radio show, Uncharted), our happiness in life tends to follow a “U-curve”, peaking in our youth and again in old age, with a big dip in our 40s and 50s. Using data from thousands of participants around the world, this U-Shape showed up again and again, with the vast majority reporting a slump in middle age and a revival in spirits as they get older.
Why might this be? Is it when we realise that the dreams of our youth will never be realised? Might we feel disappointment or even despair if we haven’t yet become a professional footballer, a CEO or simply haven’t found meaning and purpose in our work?
Actually, it might not be anything to do with circumstances. Strangely when researchers looked at studies of the mental wellbeing of chimps and orangutans, they saw a similar bell curve - turns out even primates have a mid-life crisis!
For me personally, the research didn’t ring true (although many of the people who contact me for coaching would be at the dip of that bell curve). At the moment, I’m in my mid 40s which should be prime slump time, but I’m pretty happy with my life. On the other hand, I feel less hopeful about the future and that supposed second peak in old age. Is it really possible that I'll be happier in the future given the global economic and environmental challenges ahead?
I’m curious, has your life followed the Happiness Bell Curve? What has been the happiest time of your life?